Can we be happier at work?

A lot of people struggle with their relationship with work. As I reflect back on this year and what I have been working on (Seven Pillars of Workplace Well-being, which I have posted about quite frequently) I begin to feel that there is a lot that needs to be done to make working more sustainable. People can be happier at work.

I talk to a lot to people who are sliding into burnout. The lucky ones manage to realize what is happening to them in time and ask for help. Some are not so lucky and need to go on a longer sick leave, a lot of them do not come back to their old jobs, traumatized by the experience of extreme fatigue and stress. As I have been listening to their stories I realized one important thing: self-awareness is key to happy working. Lack of self-awareness leads to situations where one works, works and works some more until one day they just can't get up for work and they are done. 

The problem with self-awareness though is that it is such a vague term. Increasing self-awareness creates associations with long-term therapy or digging through a ton of trauma, defenses, mechanisms and protective layers in order to get to the core. But it doesn't need to be this way - there are shortcuts that can help understand what needs to change in our relationship with work in order for us to thrive.

Relationship with work.

As the end of the year is coming I invite you to ask yourself three important questions about your relationship with work. These questions reflect three of the Seven Pillars of Workplace Well-being, answering them can give you an indication about your relationship with your work and increase your self-awareness about your work life. We won't cover all seven pillars now, so take it slow and reflect on the three answers.

• How often do you feel like you’re on autopilot at work? When stress or deadlines press in, can you pause, step back, and consider what you truly want and how to achieve it? Reflecting on this can reveal your ability to create psychological distance from work, preventing overwhelm. This is rooted in Pillar 1: Flexible Reaction Patterns.

• How often do you experience flow at work? Do you find yourself fully immersed in tasks, losing track of time, unburdened by thoughts of outcomes or rewards? This speaks to your intrinsic motivation—Pillar 2—a fragile yet vital component of well-being. Burnout often emerges when we rely too heavily on external motivators, draining our mental and emotional reserves.

• How aligned is your work with your values? Consider this on multiple levels: Does your work reflect your personal values? Are your company’s values in harmony with your own? Are those values consistently practiced? This question ties to Pillar 3, which focuses on finding meaning in your work. Without meaning, tasks can become hollow and disengagement follows.

These questions offer a structured way to explore your relationship with work. When I began sharing them with others, a striking pattern emerged: those on the brink of burnout answered quite differently from those thriving in their roles. While many think burnout is simply a result of working too much, it often reflects the quality of our relationship with work rather than the sheer volume of it.

Agnieszka Bojanowska, PhD. Founder of Well Made Training.

Relationship with colleagues.

Of course, thriving at work isn’t something we can achieve alone. People need support and connection with others to truly feel good in their roles. This is one of the reasons so many have struggled with burnout and mental health challenges after the pandemic. The shift to remote work, while offering benefits like saved commuting time and better focus for some, has come at a cost: we’ve lost the everyday connections with colleagues that keep us grounded.

It’s easy to see why staying home feels appealing. Sleeping in, avoiding traffic, and working in comfortable surroundings are hard to pass up. But many people don’t realize the hidden stress that comes with remote work. Those casual conversations, shared jokes, or even just the presence of others in the office help us feel connected and supported. Without them, work can start to feel isolating and overwhelming.

The impact of this disconnection often sneaks up on us. Over time, the lack of social interaction can leave us feeling drained and less engaged, even if the work itself hasn’t changed. Finding ways to rebuild those connections—whether it’s through intentional meetups, training, or simply showing up when we can—can make a big difference in how we experience our workday.

The need for workplace well-being education.

The need for workplace well-being education has never been clearer. Over the past year, I’ve had countless conversations about burnout prevention and creating healthier work environments. While most people recognize the importance of workplace well-being, the real challenge lies in the details. Many managers I’ve spoken with admit to feeling unprepared and unequipped. The basics of the psychology behind work-related happiness often feel daunting or out of reach.

On top of that, managers are already stretched thin with their existing responsibilities. Expecting them to support the mental well-being of their teams without proper training is simply unrealistic. But what if workplace well-being education wasn’t just about another task to add to their workload? What if it also addressed the well-being of managers themselves?

Managers are not immune to the pressures and stress of modern work, and when their own well-being is overlooked, it becomes nearly impossible for them to care for others effectively. By prioritizing the mental and emotional health of managers, we give them the tools and experiences they need to integrate well-being practices seamlessly into their leadership. When they understand and feel the benefits firsthand, supporting their teams becomes a natural extension of their own well-being journey.

This approach creates a win-win: managers who are not only more resilient and fulfilled in their own roles but who can also foster the same for their teams. With the right education and support, workplace well-being can stop feeling like an extra burden and instead become a shared culture that benefits everyone.